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Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Avril Breaks Her Silence
"Uh huh... Kind of. Sort of."

That about says it all. But, for good measure...

Avril on her new image: "It's part of being a girl. It's like, you reach a certain age and start wearing make-up and doing your hair and wearing heels."

Avril on nudity: "I don't know how far I would go. I think it would be done in a more classy, sexy way if I was showing more skin, as opposed to a provocative, maybe slutty way."

(Oh laugh now, but in twenty years when she shows up on the cover of Playboy, we're all going to feel bad inside.)

Avril on marriage: "I was telling Deryck, I'm like, 'I'm not getting married until I'm, like, 25.' And then - you can never plan these things."

(Note that the writer has left in every 'like.' This is both entirely fair and completely gratuitous. Fair because that's actually how Avril talks. Gratuitous because THAT'S, UH, HOW, UM, EVERYBODY TALKS. In general, writers only refuse to clean such stuff up when it's convenient.)

Anyway. She's a big girl now. And I couldn't be happier for her. Really. I feel like I should hire Aerosmith and throw her a Bat Mitzvah or something. And I'm not even Jewish (nor, I believe, is she).

But I would like it noted how wonderfully ironic it is that Avril now looks more like Britney than Britney looks like Britney.

Monday, February 27, 2006

Sexier than Alanis? I'm Sorry, I Can't Imagine Such A Thing.
Oh, happy day.

I'm actually kind of upset now that I'm not going to the Junos. And I never (ever, ever, ever, etc.) thought I'd say that.

Now then. The question must be asked: What really is the difference between Pam Anderson and Shania Twain? Honestly, I'm struggling mightily to answer that.

Even better question: Which is the greater Canadian icon? Complete toss up that one.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

VJ Search: Episodes 3 and 4
I didn't get around to posting about Episode 3 (something about trying to get a life), so here then are various thoughts on last week and this week's installments.

1. For those keeping score at home: Sean is the gay guy, Frank is the black guy, Tim is the sensitive guy, Nikki is the sensible girl, Erik is the cool guy, Larissa is the bitch and Rebecca is the one who uttered the immortal phrase "I'm aroused in places I never knew I could be aroused in" when discussing her impending move to the penthouse.

2. Second best quote of last week goes to Sean for the nearly immortal: "For me, I'm more comfortable staying in a room with women." (Has anyone yet written a story about straight men pretending to be gay to pick up women? I have absolutely no evidence to prove this is actually happening, but it seems too brilliant an idea not to have been tried somewhere already.)

3. Sean could go either way right now. On the one hand, he's almost a parody of himself (enthusiastically personifying every gay stereotype imaginable while refusing to officially recognize the death of the fauxhawk). On the other hand, he's quite possibly shaping up to be one of the greatest characters in reality show history. At the end of last week's episode he proclaimed himself "the faggot on the reality show." This raises the possibility that he's also somewhat subversive.

4. While we're on the subject, has MuchMusic ever had an openly gay VJ? Actually, has Canada ever had an openly gay television personality? (Spare me your snarky references to various individuals who may or may not be gay. Unless you're willing to pay for the inevitable libel lawsuit.)

4. The big conflict in Episode 3: Whether or not the contestants should buy fish at the grocery store. That probably tells you more about this show than anything else I can possibly say here.

5. Last week, "expert" panelist Robin Black criticized some contestants for telling the press that they saw the job of VJ as a stepping stone to bigger things. That probably tells you more about this show's misguided sense of importance than anything else I can say here.

6. This week Erik and Frank nearly got into a fist fight. I've reviewed the tape at least 15 times and I still can't figure out why. Apparently next week the feud escalates. This could be awesome. Or at least upgrade this show from "awkward bore" to "cringe-worthy trainwreck."

7. Last week they kicked off Norm, this week they booted Nathalie. Apparently they're now part of some loser panel that will critique the show. Or something. I have no idea what this means, but I needed an excuse to post this blog comment from Norm:

"Some may consider me a loser for getting kicked off the show first. Some may consider me a victor for surpassing 2000 plus VJ hopefuls to get into the top 10. I personally feel that I am neither a winner or a loser, I am Norman."

8. Second-best blog comment goes to judge Farley FlexKardinal:

"Larissa? That little princess is just lucky some of the other judges like her. She cries at the drop of a dime. None of the other contestants like her. She definitely smells of Eau De Biyotch (Pardon my French)."

9. Apparently this is Rebecca's personal website. Enjoy.

10. I've decided that my favourite subplot of all is MuchMusic's attempts to make this show seem meaningful and dramatic. Basically this involves repeated shots of Steve Anthony looking confused and/or concerned.

11. Next week on America's Next Top Model, the contestants get makeovers. In the weekly challenge, they then compete to see who can give VJ Devon the best wedgie.

12. If I was running my own mob-connected, illegal gambling ring I would bet on: Nikki. Nice, stable, inoffensive, least likely to punch someone in the face. At this point, that's more than enough.

Monday, February 20, 2006

Help Wanted
I'm convinced there's an occupation to be created that involves simply advising sporting events on their choices for musical entertainment. For instance, before the NBA dunk contest in Houston on Saturday night, Andrea Bocelli performed. Now, if Google had a people search (you know it's inevitable) and you searched for "NBA fan" + "Andrea Bocelli fan," how many hits do you suppose you'd get? Maybe three?

Sunday managed to top that though. First, Fergie performed the American anthem before the Daytona 500. And then Jann Arden sang the Canadian anthem before the NBA All-Star Game.

Somehow this is Janet Jackson's fault isn't it?

(See previously: The Black Eyed Peas vs. Grey Cup.)

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Oh Boy
Received an e-mail this evening informing me that Coldplay were not, repeat NOT, breaking up. My first reaction: Who said Coldplay were breaking up?

Apparently Chris Martin did. Except, they're not.

Anyway. Before that was clarified, EMI stock dropped 3.2%. (Bloomberg reassures: "It's not uncommon for bands to take breaks after a string of hit albums and concert tours, usually for a short period before fans move on to the latest hot act." Thanks for clarifying that Bloomberg.)
Shocking
This just in... rock n roll is exactly like you think it is.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Kanye News Network
Tonight's top stories:
West blames vote-sharing for Grammy album loss
Kanye West blames cockiness on wine
Kanye West Is Sex and Porn Mad!
Britney and Kevin Fight At Kanye West Performance
Kanye West Doesn't Like Fatties

And after the break... The latest on the emerging Kanye-Cruise relationship.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Excerpts From The Biography Of Transportation Secretary Norman Y. Mineta
"Norman Y. Mineta is the longest serving Secretary in the history of the U.S. Department of Transportation, becoming the 14th Secretary of Transportation on January 25, 2001... As Secretary of Transportation, Mineta oversees an agency with almost 60,000 employees and a $61.6 billion budget...

"At the U.S. Department of Transportation, Secretary Mineta has delivered on the President's historic commitment to safety. During his first four years as Secretary, America achieved the lowest vehicle fatality rate ever recorded, the highest safety belt usage rate ever recorded, and the lowest rail fatality level ever recorded. The Secretary has overseen the safest three-year period in aviation history. In addition, Secretary Mineta was instrumental in persuading every state in the country to set a blood alcohol rate at .08 percent, an alcohol level that has proved to be effective in preventing automobile crashes and improving safety... Secretary Mineta also oversaw the Coast Guard's response to the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, including developing the Sea Marshal Program, Maritime Safety and Security Teams, and expanding the number and mission of Coast Guard Port Security Units...

"In February 2006, he began what would be his most ambitious project to date, combating the public safety menace that is Britney Spears."
Maybe The World Really Does Begin And End With Kanye
'Publisher defends decision to reprint cartoons'...

Levant, meanwhile, asks why society finds it more acceptable to poke fun at the Christian faith, pointing to a recent cover of Rolling Stone magazine which shows hip hop artist Kanye West made up to look like Jesus.

"Why are we making a special exception for one religion?" asked Levant, who is Jewish.

"I know why. Because Christians, when they're upset, they write a letter to the editor. Radical Muslims, when they're upset, burn down embassies."


Wait. Is Ezra saying Christians should get together and burn down the Rolling Stone offices?

Monday, February 13, 2006

Great Moments In Music Licensing #3628
Channel surfing Sunday afternoon I came across Coldplay's Speed of Sound being used to soundtrack the wonder and drama that is a billiards trick shot exhibition. Strangely, it worked.

Friday, February 10, 2006

The Ghost Of Bill Barilko
Finally got around to buying the new issue of Rolling Stone and while the Kanye interview is entertaining (more on that later, perhaps), the best part is a short feature on Axl Rose making his first public appearance in more than two years. Apparently he declared that Chinese Democracy would be out this year. And did so while wearing a #26 Toronto Maple Leafs jersey.

If I were running my own illegal gambling ring, I would probably be willing to take bets on which will happen first: The release of Chinese Democracy or the Maple Leafs winning the Stanley Cup.
Hugs, Not Drugs
Leif Garrett then.

Leif Garrett now.
This Must Be Heaven
Kanye West says what we're all thinking...

... while Brandon Flowers throws up a little bit in his mouth.

Thursday, February 9, 2006

Sort Of Blogging The Grammies
... in which I attempt to put together a blow-by-blow account of The Grammys only to get distracted and eventually wind up watching Law & Order.

8pm. I don't get The Gorillaz. I mean, that was completely lifeless. Where is the appeal in a bunch of bored-looking cartoon characters singing boring music? How is this revolutionary? And did you notice how even when Madonna was out there, the people up front - you know, the ones they recruit specifically to act excited for everything - didn't seem all that into it?

8:07pm. Nice to see Jenna "I'm only here because CBS demanded it due to the fact this network has inexplicably dedicated much of its immediate future to my long-forgotten appeal" Elfman.

8:10pm. I can't believe even Stevie Wonder is making "Stevie Wonder is blind" jokes at this point.

8:13pm. Interesting to see that when Lance and Sheryl broke up he apparently got custody of all the bras.

8:18pm. Oh look, Chris Martin is running around through the audience. Frig. Why don't you just change your name to Bono now and get it over with already? Nice sneakers though.

8:19pm. That reminds me, why on earth was there a guy wearing a Brad Miller jersey dancing with Madonna? Brad Miller? Really? Was that supposed to be ironic?

8:24pm. You can tell this John Legend performance is important because they're showing it in black and white. He's probably going to win 18 awards tonight. That's if they actually get around to handing out any awards.

8:29pm. Time to placate the Red States with some country music. Whoever this is, is she supposed to be Nashville's Kelly Clarkson? And was that song a minute and 45 seconds or did it just seem that way?

8:31pm. Congratulations Merle Haggard. Too bad we didn't care enough to give you this lifetime achievement award while you were still alive. Ah well.

8:40pm. A bit too much fog on Vertigo. Sort of looks like somebody lit the place on fire. Nonetheless, Jenna Elfman liked it enough to give it a standing ovation... And now, uh, One?... Oh I see, it's an excuse to do one of these "Grammy collaborations" with Mary J. Blige. Meh. It works all right. But it seems a little too random and, therefore, a little forced.

8:46pm. Is Kanye wearing black gloves? What does this mean? Because you know it means something. And you know we're going to hear about it. My guess: "George Bush doesn't care about black formal wear."

8:47pm. Wait, now Bowie is getting a lifetime achievement award? Presented by Matt Dillon and Ludacris?... Wait, now Matt Dillon is helping present the rap album of the year award? I hope the Grammy organizers realize he's not related to Bob.

8:48pm. Kanye wins. And yes, he's rocking black gloves. And his shirt is unbuttoned to his belly button. And he's wearing sun glasses as big as my head... And, damnit, he didn't say anything controversial.

8:55pm. And heeeerrrreeee'sss... Ben Roethlisberger? Funny story. Standing beside Big Ben in the Pittsburgh locker room shortly after the game on Sunday, he appeared to have something of a gut. Now, maybe he just hadn't removed all his padding yet. But I kinda hope it was a gut. Makes him even more likeable. And yes, maybe this story was just an excuse to mention that I was in the Steelers locker room shortly after they won the Super Bowl.

8:58pm. The rest of this decade is going to belong to Kelly Clarkson. I'm all atwitter just thinking about it.

9pm. Pregnant Gwen Stefani is huge. HUGE!

9:02pm. U2 wins a Grammy. Major upset.

9:09pm. If I asked you to predict what Paul McCartney's drummer would look like, there's no way on earth you'd say a huge bald dude with big, gold earrings and a massive goatee.

9:12pm. Woah. McCartney tears into Helter Skelter. Pretty much makes up for every daft thing he's ever done. Funny story. Last year around this time when he was due to play the Super Bowl I wrote a column about McCartney. It wasn't terribly harsh, but when I came into the office there was a message on my voice mail that went something like: "Hi this message is for Aaron Wherry, first of all, Paul McCartney rocks. And as for your comment about vegetarianism, you can go fuck yourself."

9:16pm. And now Jennifer Love Hewitt (see Elfman, Jenna) and Black Eyed Peas come on stage and one of the Peas takes it upon himself to announce that earlier in the night he and his band won a Grammy. Arguably the most irrelevant moment in the history of television.

9:21pm. By the way, the Raptors are within a point of San Antonio with two and a half minutes to go.

9:27pm. Fifty-five seconds to go, tie game... nope, San Antonio up by two... hold on, Antonio Davis tap back, tie game.

9:29pm. Wait. Why is there a minister preaching during Mariah's performance?

9:31pm. Charlie Villanueva blocks a Bruce Bowen shot... off to overtime.

9:35pm. Eventually Kelly Clarkson is going to have to find something better than "Oh my god, you guys, I just can't believe this is happening."

9:40pm. Now playing the part of Skinny Stefani, Jenna Elfman.

9:41pm. Keith Urban and Faith Hill perform. When you think about, this could make for a really interesting episode of Wife Swap.

9:49pm. Jay-Z and Linkin Park win for rap/sung collaboration. No joke really necessary.

9:54pm. Raptors lose. Raptors lose. TTTThhhheeee Raptors lose.

9:56pm. Dave Chapelle wanders in from wherever he was and gets a huge ovation. Proceeds to make fun of himself and then introduces a bizarrely cast tribute to Sly Stone. My favourite moment so far.

9:58pm. I think I'm officially tired of Joss Stone. It's like she's become a parody of herself.

9:59pm. I think I speak for all of North America when I ask, "So, uh, who is this guy with Fantasia? And, wait, Fantasia is still alive?"

10:00pm. I live every day in fevered anticipation of the day the Maroon 5 guy returns to wherver he came from.

10:01pm. Law & Order. See you in an hour.

10:59pm. Another dramatic closing argument from Jack McCoy pulls one out of the fire. And now Christina Aguilera is attempting to prove herself a Serious Musician. Or having a seizure.

11:05pm. I did manage to flip over at one point and catch Kanye's performance. Pretty good, even if Arcade Fire did the marching band thing first and better.

11:17pm. James Taylor and Bonnie Raitt up to present album of the year. And the nominees are... McCartney's ready to go home and have a nap. Gwen knows she hasn't got a chance. U2 know they made the best album and don't care if they win. Kanye's praying...

And the winner is... U2. Bono makes point of going over to shake Kanye's hand, thereby avoiding any future "Bono hates black people" controversy. Then he says something like, "Kanye, you're next." Which is another way of saying, "Uh, yeah, Kanye, you should have won this."

11:22pm. The recording industry, once again saving the world from the forces of evil, blah, blah, blah... "all-star celebration" blah, blah, blah... the recording industry loves black people blah, blah, blah... jammy thing ensues... and scene.

Final tally:
U2: 5
Kanye: 3
Mariah: 3
Kelly: 2
Jenna: 0

Wednesday, February 8, 2006

'I'll bring Sean to the table'
For seemingly obvious reasons I missed the first episode, but I think I said something at some point about obsessively blogging MuchMusic's new reality series VJ Search. Some quick thoughts on Episode Two.

1. First impression: I'm probably going to regret this. Very simply, this show isn't that good. It's not even like Paradise-Hotel-bad. Or Joe-Millionaire-bad. It's just bad. If we were betting (sorry, it's going to take awhile for the Super Bowl to work itself out of my brain), the over/under on this show's budget would be about $565. And most of that would be taken up by hair care for the host, Dina Pugliese.

2. Anyway. In Episode Two they cut the list from 20 to 10. Your finalists are: Casey-Jo, Erik, Frank, Larissa, Nathalie, Nikki, Norm, Rebecca, Sean and Tim. If you can find a casino willing to take your money on something like this, take Nikki or Erik. Probably the latter, because, I would wager, more 12-year-old girls than 12-year-old boys watch MuchMusic and ultimately that's who gets to decide this thing.

2. The judges are Steve Anthony, Robin Black, Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson. Which begs the question(s): Robin Black? Are you kidding me? Robin Black? When was the last time MuchMusic aired a Robin Black video? Does anyone know anyone who actually listens to Robin Black? And what exactly qualifies Robin Black as a VJ expert? Can someone walk me through this?

3. For their first challenge, the 20 contestants had to interview either Yellowcard or Our Lady Peace. Neither band seemed particularly interested in being there, but kudos to Yellowcard for pointing out that certain contestants stood a better chance of winning because they were hot. Refreshingly honest.

4. Sort of satisfying to see Raine Maida made to sit through that though.

5. The extent of the 'research package' each contestant received seemed to be a copy of the band's album and a record label bio. If this was in fact the case, why am I not at all surprised?

6. The apparent catch phrase for each dismissal: 'You're off the air.' I imagine the second choice was, 'You're no Diego Fuentes.'

7. Best quote from Episode Two, courtesy of Robin Black: "We're looking for somebody special." Because when I think about MuchMusic VJs, the first word that comes to mind is always, special.

8. Actually, the saving grace of this show might be the fact that they've given the finalists blogs. This is almost definitely going to be entertaining. Though not quite Paradise-Hotel-entertaining. In fact, it might even turn this show into meta-reality. (In Episode Two, somebody 'confessed' something about people having fake romances because they figured the producers would be more willing to keep them on the show if they thought there was something going on.)

9. On a completely unrelated note, apparently while I was away VJ Leah was involved in something that required her to learn how to pole dance. If this is true, I've learned my lesson: I'm never leaving the house again.

10. I promise I won't kill this show every week. That'll just get tedious. In fact, as a gesture of goodwill, I'm going to give the last word here to contestant Larissa, taken from her most recent blog entry:

"I'm looking outside watching the world evolve in front of me yet I cannot touch it. What a frustrating feeling of everything happening at once and still at the same time life is standing still."

So true.

Monday, February 6, 2006

Soft
(I'll get back to the rock soon enough. But before I leave Detroit, one last football post.)

I truly wish it wasn't so, but Jerramy Stevens is done. He will never get past tonight. In four years he will be out of the league, probably playing arena ball or something. And his will probably go down as one of the most unlikely unravelings in professional sports history.

On Tuesday morning, Stevens was merely the starting tight end for the Seattle Seahawks. A former first-round draft pick he has enjoyed an altogether unspectacular career. All things considered he was likely bound for an average to slightly above average career.

Tuesday afternoon Stevens makes a comment about his team possibly winning the Super Bowl on Sunday. The next morning his comment appears in the papers. And shortly thereafter everything changes.

Pittsburgh linebacker Joey Porter, who the press has been goading at every opportunity all week, decides to pick up on the comment and get himself fired up for the game with a little smack talk. The press, with absolutely nothing else to talk about, runs with it and turns Porter v. Stevens into the week's dominant story.

Stevens is besieged and Porter is encouraged to up the ante. Porter obliges and takes issue not just with the comment, but actually questions Stevens' manhood and worth as a football player. Suddenly this isn't just the biggest story of the week, it's the only story.

(The funny thing: I bet if you polled the 3,000 members of the media here, 2,500 of them would have agreed that this was a fairly insignificant story. But mob mentality supersedes everything. Especially when there are thousands of column inches and countless hours of airtime to fill.)

You knew it can only end one of two ways. First, if Seattle wins and Stevens plays well, he and his teammates will have defiantly answered Porter's comment, the Pittsburgh linebacker's gambit having back-fired miserably. Second, if Pittsburgh wins and Stevens struggles even slightly, the storyline will follow that Stevens was unable to answer Porter's challenge. He will have choked. His entire career will be thrown into doubt as teammates and opponents sense that when it comes down to it, Stevens doesn't have the guts to compete. He will be, as Porter said, soft - bar none the worst thing you can say about any professional athlete.

So what happened? Stevens didn't just struggle, he absolutely bombed. He dropped crucial passes, including Seattle's last play in the final seconds. In desperation time he failed to get out of bounds after making a catch, essentially killing whatever hope Seattle had left. Even on the pass he caught for a touchdown he looked awkward and unsure of himself.

In the dressing room he didn't even bother to change out of his equipment at first - just sat there at his stool, staring at the floor. I'm not sure how you could not feel sorry for the guy. In the biggest game of his life he was completely emasculated. But he got screwed. He was the unwitting victim of forces much, much bigger than himself.

This wasn't Buckner or Norwood. He didn't just pick a bad time to make a single mistake. Jerramy Stevens was set up. He turned his head for a second and, bang, he was completely blind-sided.

I don't know how he recovers from this. Well, actually, I have some idea how he could recover. He could come back next year, put up Pro Bowl numbers, help Seattle back to the Super Bowl and have a decent performance in a winning effort. But how likely is that? More or less likely than Stevens having another so-so season and gradually falling out of favour in Seattle now that he no longer has the benefit of the doubt and has seemingly confirmed that he doesn't have "what it takes" to succeed at this level?

I really, really want it to be the former. I'm not sure how anyone can't want this guy to redeem himself. Well, anyone other than Joey Porter, but with any luck you are not Joey Porter.

As it is, he's going to get killed in the morning papers. And on television for days and weeks to come. When next season starts, this will all get dragged up again. There will be lots of stories about his attempt to redeem himself, what he learned from the experience and how he spent the summer searching his soul and refocusing himself. Teammates and coaches will pledge their confidence. Someone will pen a fantastic 10-page, soft-focus profile for Sports Illustrated. It'll be compelling stuff, but I'm not convinced it will amount to much of anything.

Lesson #1: The Joey Porters of the world win far more often than they should.

Lesson #2: Fame sucks.

Saturday, February 4, 2006

Detroit, Day... 17?
In the span of 24 hours Detroit has gone from having clearly too few people within its limits to having absolutely too many. It's actually getting tough to move around. I'm sort of concerned that when everyone heads towards Ford Field for the game (remarkably, there is an actual game at the end of all this), we're all going to get stuck along Woodward like when then the Three Stooges all tried to go through a door at the same time. I'm quite serious about this.

***

Yesterday, some of the past Super Bowl MVPs were on hand for commissioner Paul Tagliabue's state of the league address. In introducing them he applauded what they have "meant to our game and to America in terms of its values..." Included in this group: Ray Lewis and Joe Namath.

***

I'm not sure I've been to a single press conference that hasn't involved at least some mention of God and/or his collected works. And I've now been to approximately 796 press conferences.

I have to think, with the possible exception of Nascar, professional football has to be considered the most faith-based of all the North American professional sports. And I've been thinking hard to find a reason for this.

The best I can offer: You almost have to possess a belief in some higher purpose and meaning to play a game that a) demands such a high level of trust among teammates and b) simply destroys the body.

A study came out this week noting the high mortality rate among relatively young football players, but even the players who survive to see a seventh or eighth decade seem to do so with badly broken bodies. In terms of the latter, I'm not sure you could find another North American profession that inflicts such damage on the human body - never mind that the average career is less than four years. Coal mining maybe? Professional daredevil?

I imagine Evil Knievel and your friendly neighbourhood coal miner would probably tell you the same thing - if you're going to spend life in not inconsiderable discomfort, you've got to believe that there is a higher purpose beyond this crap.

Thursday, February 2, 2006

Detroit, Day 4
Strolled out of my hotel and happened upon the guy from Napolean Dynamite (you know, the one we won't remember this time next year) doing a radio interview. Then flipped through the local newspaper and discovered that Star Jones will be at a nearby bookstore today signing copies of her newest guide to human perfection.

Now I remember why I'm here.

***

The producer of Sunday's halftime show said today that there was room for spontaneity this year. With that his pants spontaneously burst into flames.

***

Super Bowl halftime shows really haven't been the same since they stopped building them around very particular themes. The seven best of all-time:

7. XXV: A Small World Salute to 25 Years of Super Bowl (New Kids on the Block)
6. XXIX: Indiana Jones & Temple of Forbidden Eye (Patti LaBelle, Tony Bennett, Arturo Sandoval and Miami Sound Machine)
5. XXVI: Winter Magic (Gloria Estefan, Brian Boitano and Dorothy Hamill)
4. XXIV: Salute to New Orleans/Snoopy's 40th Birthday (Pete Fountain, Doug Kershaw and Irma Thomas)
3. VII: Happiness Is. (University of Michigan Band and Woody Herman)
2. XXIII: Be Bop Bamboozled (South Florida-area dancers and performers and 3-D effects)
1. XXVII: Heal the World (Michael Jackson and 3,500 local children)

Wednesday, February 1, 2006

Detroit, Day 3
The morning paper brought news that, due to a significant lack of snow, organizers fear they may not be able to include snowmobile rides and dog sledding in the downtown winter celebration.

I'm not even sure why I'm here anymore.

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