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Thursday, October 27, 2005

White Sox Win! White Sox Win! White So... Zzzzzzzz...
Sorry, but if you're an Astros fan within arm's reach of Juan Uribe when he lunges into the stands, don't you have a responsibility to reach up and knock that ball away? Uribe's on your turf, it's entirely legal. Sure, even if he fails to make that catch, maybe the Astros don't win the game. And even if the Astros win the game, they would've remained a wild longshot to win the series. But still. It's the principle of the matter. You've got to make that play. And if you punk Uribe, the Astros pull it out in the ninth and then pull out one of the great comebacks in baseball history, you instantly become probably the greatest fan in the history of the game. Or at least the most celebrated. Instead, you - you sheepish Houston fans enjoying your premium seats down the third base line - are still waiting for your team to win a World Series game. Good luck with that.

Anyway. Onward to the actual subject of this post - MuchMusic VJ Leah.

We were fairly certain Leah (pronounced, of course, like the princess) was bound to be remembered as one of the single greatest MuchMusic VJs to come along since the passing of Rick the Temp before we actually understood why. There was just something about her. Then we took the unprecedented and extraordinary step of Googling her.

Now, we didn't actually find much of anything beyond her official MuchMusic page. And though that official page is likely full of carefully spun half-truths dreamed up by some Chum p.r. guru to impress easily impressed guys like us, we're willing to accept their legitimacy. If only because most of the details only confirm our initial theory — that Leah is probably one of the more half-interesting VJs of our lifetime.

Take first her generally impressive musical interests: "Fiona Apple, Bob Dylan, Eminem, Jack Johnson, The Beatles, Robbie Williams, Tenacious D, Radiohead and Coldplay." Agreed, Tenacious D is generally only tolerable in very small doses. And the rest seem pretty obviously pulled from the Dummies Guide to Impressing Your Moderately Cool Friends and Proving Your Musical Knowledge Extends Beyond The Trivial Tastes of Today's Teenagers. But there is the presence of Robbie Williams. And you'd be hard-pressed to find anyone in North America willing to publicly acknowledge an unironic appreciation for Robbie Williams. That takes courage.

Her favourite book is The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran, which she can apparently quote from memory. To be honest, we have not read this book. Nor do we know about much Kahlil Gibran, though Wikipedia describes him as "probably the most famous Lebanese-American writer ever" and The Prophet can be read online here. Sample passage:

"Your soul is oftentimes a battlefield, upon which your reason and your judgment wage war against passion and your appetite. Would that I could be the peacemaker in your soul, that I might turn the discord and the rivalry of your elements into oneness and melody. But how shall I, unless you yourselves be also the peacemakers, nay, the lovers of all your elements?"

Though generally careful not to assume too much, we'd pretty willingly bet that few VJs, with the exception probably of Michael Williams, could claim great affinity for anything similar.

Oh, but it does not end there.

Alongside Jessica Biel she apparently once appeared in an episode of Punk'd and school'd Stephen Dorff. Admirable.

In 1999 she played 'Toll Girl' in New Jersey Turnpikes, starring Kelsey Grammer, Lee Majors, football legend Jim Brown and boxing great Roy Jones Jr. A year later she played 'Jimmy's Blonde Friend' in the TV movie Hendrix. And a year after that she tackled the difficult and challenging role of 'Tina Lovette (the Party Girl)' in Chris Rock's Down To Earth. All very impressive.

And just in case you were worried that Leah was just some Radiohead-loving, Gibran-quoting, Dorff-punking flash-in-the-pan, let us also point towards her expressed interests in public policy - namely, "wildlife preservation and healthcare for Canada’s children, seniors and homeless."

So there. True, she can't rap like VJ Matte (sample rhyme: "I cut with precision on a sharp exacto mission. My style was so nice they had to check me out twice."), but we're fairly certain - without doing much research into the matter - that we'd put that resume up against any other mildly interesting VJ. Even Steve Anthony.

None of this, mind you, is of any actual significance or relevance.

Update. Off the top of our head, what we think were/are probably the ten best VJs (that is, most skilled at the dark arts of video jockeying) since we acquired access to cable television (ie. sometime in the late 80s).

(Note: That time frame does tend to exclude what historians consider the golden age of MuchMusic VJs, namely Denise Donlon, JD, Christoper Ward, KCC, Daniel Richler, etc.)

1) Erica Ehm. (Sort of an icon.)
2) Rick The Temp. (Different era, different icon.)
3) Master T.
4) Steve Anthony.
5) Sook-Yin Lee. (Exception to every rule, but it worked.)

Update II. Actually. Having slept on it, we really only feel strongly about the first five. So...

6) Michael Williams.
7) Craig F. Halket.
8) Rachel Perry (Probably better than we remember.)
9) Simon Evans.
10) Monika Deol.

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