Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Enough of that nonsense. Promise never to speak of it again.

Cos I have (finally) heard the future. And it is Afroman's Afroholic... Even Better Times (samples courtesy of Aaron Brophy at the Cancrit board).

If you listen to one song today, let it be Whack Rappers in which the man who gave us Because I Got High picks a fight with just about every other rapper on the planet.

Sample rhymes:

I think you cra-zee
If you like Jay-Z
Don't change clothes
Change the CD

Afro motherfuckin' M-A-N
Can't stand no motherfuckin' Ying-Yang Twins

I think Lil' Jon and the Eastside Boyz
Is an irritating, ignorant bunch of noise

What's fabolous about it?
I think you terrible
Music unbearable
Ripping off Mase
With that look on his face
Oh man, I rest my case

Kelis, this is what I want you to do
Get on your knees
Face me
I've got a milkshake for you
And its tasty
Just like your album

Puff Daddy, enough already
Now it's P.Diddy
Still sound shitty
How can your group be called Da Band?
Nobody plays an instrument man

Why is David Banner running from the Klan?
What happened to the bitches man?

Missy Elliott, thinks she looks like Halle Berry
That's scary

(sung to the tune of the chorus from Work It)
Her CD ain't worth it
Put your money in your pocket and reverse it
Missy Elliott makes a bunch of bullshit

Even with a weave
I can't stand Eve
I can't stand Eve, that's what I said
She got a pinhead

Later he mocks 50 Cent for rapping like Mike Tyson.

It's the new How to Rob. Only for slow kids.

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